Monthly Archives: May 2009

AfterEllen.com Hot 100 in 2009!

I think ladies have great taste in ladies.

AfterEllen.com’s hot 100 in 2009 list came out yesterday.

Here are the top 10.

1. Portia de Rossi

 

2. Jennifer Beals

3.  Lena Headley

4. Leisha Hailey

5. Sarah Shahi (my personal #1)

6. Rachel Maddow

7. Tina Fey

8. Sarah Ramirez

9. Angelina Jolie

10. Gro Hammerseng

 

An interesting comparison is the Maxim Hot 100. They haven’t come out with their 2009 list yet, but the top 10 in 2008 were:

1. Marissa Miller

2. Scarlett Johansson

3. Jessica Biel

4. Eva Longoria Parker

5. Sarah Michelle Gellar

6. Elisha Cuthbert

7. Eva Mendes

8. Christina Aguilera

9. Lindsay Lohan

10. Ashley Tisdale

O’Reilly Wants To Marry Lenny…and Squiggy

I’ve been saying gayness is a slippery slope for years! Once you give it a try, it’s nearly impossible to get yourself back on the Straight-town Express (I speak only from personal experience). I am referring of course, to expanding thinking about what love looks like and the kinds of ‘rules’ people think govern their romances and relationships. But Bill O’Reilly left me wondering…will the legalization of gay marriage mark the end of civilization as we know it…?!

O’Reilly brought up a solid point last night.If you allow gay marriage, how can you deny polygamous or polyamorous marriages? What about when a person wants to marry a turtle? or a goat?

click here to watch the video

click here to watch the video

Is gay marriage a slippery slope…? I’m not sure about that one. I believe that there is a big difference between two consenting adults willfully entering into a legal contract and a man walking into city hall with his goat on a rope looking to get hitched. But is there? Does this beautiful goat deserve her own white wedding?
Then what?! We’ll have to figure out how to regulate the relationships of all the little goat boys and girls running around?!

My question is, if gay marriage is in fact a slippery slope, and it opens the floodgates to all kinds of legally recognized love, what does the country stand to lose? Is there a terrifying mortal doom awaiting us all at the bottom of that slippery slope?

Or consider for a minute that the slippery slope is the best ride we’ve ever had as a country…?

slippery_slope

 

I’m not sure if gay marriage is a slippery slope. I’m not sure if polygamy is a good or bad thing. I’m not sure if that goat isn’t wishing and hoping for her day to walk down the aisle. But what I’m REALLY not sure about is, what is so bad about a slippery slope? What if it leads us to the promised land? What if we’re so afraid to cross over to the other side of the mountain and take a trip down the slippery slope, that we can’t even see the amazing progress and good that is hanging out on the other side?

And He’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen the promised land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people will get to the promised land. And I’m happy, tonight.

– Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

He knew the slippery slope was exactly where the country needed to go.

Sniff, Swig, Puff!

In honor of the weekend, and the recent passing of icon Bea Arthur, I think everybody should turn it on!

Hold it Ma! Don’t Touch that muffin!
God knows what your grandpa’s huffin!
Everybody today is turnin on!!!!!!

Hate Crimes Are A ‘Hoax’

We got another one! WooHoo Maine! I always knew a state with a town called Bangor had something special going on 😉

These marriage victories are totally awesome. MA, CT, VT, ME, IA! 5 down, 45 to go. Really, the domino effect is underway and soon enough the marriage thing will be a non-issue, right? Thats super! I suppose this means I can’t blame my lack of a future possibility of marriage for my dating record for too much longer…

I have to say, even overlooking the fact that the idea of marriage kind of makes me light headed, I am really not as thrilled about the direction of the Gay Rights Movement in America as I think a lot of people are. Getting legally married is the least of my concerns when I think about the fact that I can legally be fired from a job in Virginia because of my sexuality, or that my representative in the House, Minority Whip Eric Cantor, voted AGAINST the Matthew Shepard Hate Crimes Act.

Cantor, and his conservative colleagues say they are against hate crimes legislation because it assumes the mental state of the criminal and punishes that person more harshly based on that assumption alone. They say a criminal is just a criminal and a crime is just a crime. Wow, cool idea guys. Sounds like you think punishing all crimes should be based only on the result of the crime and not the motive. Sounds like accidental death should really always be homicide, and any kind of crime based in negligence is really better tried with equal scrutiny as crimes with clear malicious motive. Furthermore, there is ALREADY HATE CRIMES LEGISLATION IN OUR FEDERAL LAW! All this act would do is extend the definition of hate crimes to include sexual orientation and gender identity as protected classes.

If it’s the hate crime legislation you don’t like, write legislation to remove all hate crime classifications from our legal system. See how that goes when you run for re-election and need the Black vote or the Hispanic vote or the Catholics…or the JEWS. This is not about how these legislators feel about the definition of hate crimes, this is about the kinds of voters they represent in their home districts and the types of attitudes they believe will get them re-elected.

That’s Eric Cantor on the right there, a good Jewish boy from the south. Richmond Jews, we ARE gems. I only bring up the Jewish thing because it so happens, religion is a protected class under the CURRENT hate crimes legislation that is the law in our country. And I only bring that up to help illustrate why Cantor’s position on the Matthew Shepard Act, shared by most if not all of the dissenting votes, is really a cover for simple bigotry and discrimination. If they tried to remove Jews from protection under  hate crimes legislation, I am sure he would have a problem with that. I WOULD TOO!

Selling your soul to pander to your voters is one thing. Wanna know what’s really out of line? Standing up on a national stage and explaining that the death of Matthew Shepard was a simple robbery, without any causal relationship existing between his sexuality and the severity and motive of the vicious murder.

Check out what Rep. Virginia Foxx (R-NC) had to say about Matthew Shepard.

Rachel Maddow hit the nail on the head in her intro to the video clip and interview with Mrs. Shepard.

… crimes like that are intended not only to hurt or murder an individual, but to terrorize an entire community. And so there is a national interest in ensuring that those crimes are solved and prosecuted.

Hate crimes have their own investigation unit within the FBI. Click Here for national statistics about the instance and motivation of hate crimes. Race is the first motivation, then religion with Jews being the number 1 religious target, then sexual orientation. Sexual minorities are the 3rd most likely group in the country to be victim of a hate crime, yet they are not a protected class under current federal definitions, and shouldn’t be according to 175 elected members of the House of Representatives. My very own representative, Eric Cantor, a good Jew protected under the current legislation, voted to keep sexual minorities out from under the umbrella of federal protection.

I just got off the phone with Cantor’s Hill office. I spoke with a nice staffer named Chris. I asked a simple question. What was the reasoning behind Rep. Cantor’s vote against the Matthew Shepard Act? Chris put me on hold while he “looked for someone who could answer the question for me,” because he didn’t know. He got back on the phone a minute or two later with some disappointing news. There was nobody in the office who could help answer my question at that time. Chris took down my name and address and said they’d get back to me. Before he hung up, I made him take down my phone number and assure me that someone from the office would call me with an answer. I’ll give him a call back tomorrow just to check in on the progress.  

I get that marriage equality is the country’s way of saying I can love anyone I want and be recognized legally for that relationship. I think that is awesome and I am SO excited about the progress on that front. A lot of hard work has gone into bringing equality to marriage law and I am profoundly appreciative of that work.

Talking about love is easy and accessible. It is a whole lot easier to churn up broad national support for campaigns that promote love, partnership, and happiness than national campaigns talking about the victims of hate crimes. The thing about hate crimes that is so important to get, is that the crime not only directly impacts the individual victim, but makes a victim out of every individual who fits into the same category that was the target of the violent hate. When I hear about things like the recent attack against gay men at UVA, you better believe it changes my level of comfort when I head back to visit. What about the first year guy who just pledged a frat and is scared to come out? How does that one hate crime impact his freedom and self-expression?

How did these hate crimes impact the LGBT people in their respective communities?

 

Like Lawrence ‘Larry’ King, killed at the age of 15 just weeks after publicly coming out as gay in his California Junior High.

 

 

Or 25 year old, Ryan Kieth Skipper who was stabbed about 20 times by two men because they say he was hitting on them.

 

 

 

 

 

Making the Gay Rights Movement about love and happiness is a great way to gain public appeal before demanding that our lives be valued equally, not just our relationships.  In all reality, my relationship is only as equal and free as the people who are a part of it.

I hope injustices like hate crimes and the truly heinous laws that discriminate against LGBT people in employment, housing, visiting rights, inheritance rights, and many other areas are not being forgotten or overlooked because we are gaining momentum in the fight for legally recognized relationships.

The Matthew Shepard Hate Crimes Act has to pass through the Senate before we can call it an actual victory. Call your Senator and make sure they are voting YES to pass it! Also, feel free to call Rep. Eric Cantor at (202) 225-2815. Check to see if your representative was one of the 175 who voted against the Act and call them to find out why.

Be responsible and make sure your voice is heard! I’ll let you know what Eric Cantor’s office says when they get back to me.

I Want A Whole Lotta Adam…!

I’m confused…again. I have a serious crush on Adam Lambert.

Maybe it’s because he also rocks this look pretty well…

Really, the source of the affection is neither here nor there. After a performance like the one he put on last night, absolutely killing it on stage singing ‘Whole Lotta Love’ by Zeppplin, I challenge you NOT to want to be ON him.

Adam and Slash should put out an album.

HA! Love This Guy.

now THATS committment!

now THAT'S committment!

I wonder what bands HE was listening to? Probably the Metallica.

What Else Is In The Teaches Of Peaches?

Ah, Peaches. You gender-bending, dirty-mouthed, son of a gun!

If you’ve never heard of Peaches, you really should make sure you read this. There is a lot to learn from her and a lot of good music to be listened to by her!

Born Merrill Beth Nisker, Peaches comes to us from the land of milk and honey, Canada. She was a school music and drama teacher before she started wearing strap-ons during live performances and making music about sex…go figure. Peaches put out an album as Merrill while she was still living in Toronto and living with her then roommate, Feist.

From there she evolved into the woman we know today, Peaches. She explains,

I got that name from a Nina Simone song called ‘Four Women.’ She sings the song talking about women’s struggle. And the last woman she describes, she gets really passionate about her. And at the end of the song she says, ‘Her name is PEACHES!’ And the way she said it, she was SO passionate that I thought I really would love her to be saying that to me.

Her next album, The Teaches Of Peaches, featured the song for which Peaches is probably most well known, ‘Fuck the Pain Away.’ This track features addictive beats and a chorus that just feels so naughty to sing it’s fun! This video is an earmuffs moment. It’s not the full version of the song, but this video is hilarious.

Peaches’ 3rd album, Fatherfucker, took her into a more politically conscious phase of her music. The criticisms and response she got from her sex-loaded album, The Teaches of Peaches, left her responding to comments about her sexuality and gender identity and personal politics. She explained the title of the album once after receiving a question about whether or not her motives were based in shock value alone.

Why do we call our mothers motherfuckers? Why do we stub our toe and say, “Aww motherfucker!”? What is a motherfucker? … We use it in our everyday language, and it’s such an insanely intense word. I’m not one to shy away from these obscene terms that we actually have in our mainstream. Motherfucker is a very mainstream word. But if we’re going to use motherfucker, why don’t we use fatherfucker? I’m just trying to be even.

She put out her 4th album entitled, Impeach My Bush, in 2006 and it became her most successful album to date debuting on the Billboard 200 at #168.

Peaches says something, in fact she says a lot of things, most of which aren’t being said in today’s music, and most of which are being thought and felt by a huge number of people. Sex is on people’s minds! Dirty, primitive, sexual thoughts have crossed EVERYBODY’S mind. Peaches is about saying the things that link us all as humans and that most people are afraid to say out loud. Peaches is about breaking down the walls we build up around ourselves to hide our thoughts and feelings. Walls that seperate us from ever really knowing that in fact, we AREN’T the only one who has ever thought that dirty little thought, and we AREN’T the only one who wants that dirty little thing. Above all, Peaches is about having a good time and loving life. Can’t really argue against that!

It’s hard to believe Peaches is 40 now, and easy to believe that her age hasn’t stopped her one bit. Her new album was released in the US yesterday. I Feel Cream features some slower than typical tracks, but the lyrics are still hard hitting and the beats are undeniably hers, strong and unforgiving. This album features probably the most melodic and pop sounding tracks Peaches has ever produced. I imagine she will sell more records with this one given the current music trends and the more widely palatable sounds in this album.

Check out Peaches’ Myspace to hear some of the new tracks. I really like this video for the song ‘Talk To Me.’

Inspiring are the people who commit their lives to self-expression no matter how many people disagree with how, what, or why they are saying whatever they are saying. It takes serious strength of character and thoughtful creativity to say something new and to say it loud. Peaches is awesome and I totally appreciate what she brings to music and to our culture. Whether or not you agree with her politcs or enjoy her music, because she is out there saying what’s on her mind, she creates a space for everybody in the world to express themselves freely.

Here is a short mini-documentary about her. It gives a good picture of what she’s about and why she is so badass.

So go turn up some Peaches, dance naked in the mirror, and love everything that you are!